Christopher face-timed me today. It was great to see and hear him. He looked really well, but he dropped a bit of a bombshell. He told me he and Olivia are going to get engaged. I asked him what he meant by ‘are going to’? Have they decided to get married one day or not? If they have, they’re engaged now. Anyway, he seemed so happy I couldn’t help being happy for him of course, but when I hung up it left me feeling sad. I’ve only met Olivia once, when I visited England about eighteen months ago to catch up with Christopher. She seems nice (not nice enough for my son, though, of course), but she’s lived in London all her life and all her family are there. Thoughts of grandchildren speaking with a funny accent who I will hardly ever see (except for when they’re banishing me from the dunes). Not to mention my son, who I was secretly hoping may come home in the next year or two. That seems out of the question now.
Also, I got the distinct impression he’d already told Wayne — before me! Shit!
I spent the rest of the day lazing on the couch, drinking coffee, eating chocolate, watching the pouring rain outside the window and feeling sorry for myself. When Agnes asked me what was wrong, I burst into tears.