Susan was all about negotiation today.
Her lesson was that negotiation is all about optimising outcomes for yourself and for others. It’s not about winning or ripping people off. It also isn’t about being rude to people. OK, good to know. She said when I sensed that an opportunity for practising my negotiating skills was in the wind, the first thing for me to do was to make sure of my facts as best I could. Apparently, facts often solve problems. I’m to do my homework, as I may find I change my own mind after I find out all the facts. I’m to give acknowledgement if I become convinced by the facts or by the other’s arguments that I’m (wholly or partly) in the wrong.
Next, if I haven’t changed my mind, I’m to try to think about what the other person really wants. Often it isn’t directly what we’re bargaining about. Often, they want to save face, to feel like they’re doing a good job, to look good in front of their boss, to demonstrate their power, to have a paper bag stuffed with $100 notes put on their desk. I’m to think about how I can give them what they really want, without being obvious, and also get what I really want. Nevertheless, I’m to be in good faith and to strive for a win-win situation whenever possible.
Then, I’m always to use the model: If you do this, then I will do that. Don’t give away my bargaining chips up front. I may not get them back. I’m never to say: I will give you this. Now, what are you going to give me? Rather, I’m to say, I will give you this if you give me that. That way, neither of us need commit to anything until we’re satisfied we’ll achieve an agreement that’s mutually acceptable.
I’m to pick my battles, as some aren’t worth fighting, either because I can’t win, they’re too trivial, or I’ll lose more than I gain (such as my future credibility). It would be surprising if I got everything I wanted, so I’m not to be disappointed if I don’t. But I’m to be careful not to use this as an excuse for not fighting any battles at all. Once again, that is where that elusive good judgement comes in.
Finally, when I’ve sold the car, I’m to stop trying to sell it. Don’t point out the added features — the other person may not have noticed them and may not want them.
Well, a lot to think about there.