An old lady who lives (lived) over the road from me (next to the obsessive leaf blower (he’s obsessive, not the leaves)), Flo, died yesterday, probably from noise pollution. One of her sons came to tell me today, in case I wanted to go to the funeral. I think they’re trying to boost numbers. While he was here, he told me he was thinking of buying his siblings’ shares of her house, so he could keep collecting her mail. Apparently, she was an MCC Life Member, and the queue for that sort of thing is, inexplicably, about 20 years long. He figured he wouldn’t tell the MCC that she’d died, so he could use her membership to get a grand final ticket each year. Great plan. What could go wrong? She was nearly 90 years old already